Happiness tip - keep the mind free of 'things you intend to do'.

Happiness is a choice of our state of mind. This is the basic premise of life and those who think they can be otherwise are actually challenging natural laws.

That said, do we realize what is the biggest hurdle or stumbling block for a HAPPY AND JOYOUS state of mind? It is simple... we deliberately clutter our mind with things and tasks that are not in the horizon, and imagine situations that will never ever happen in the journey of life.

Yet, we day in and day out bother ourself, and take move away from happiness by just exactly doing that - cluttering the mind and imagining a load of things, events and even people behaviors.

One simple and easy way to de-clutter the mind is to STOP thinking about tasks that we are not going to do, or do not have a time frame committed. If you don't plan to do something - be it a simple chore or a project (big or small, simple or complex), then what is the point in thinking about it all the time; neither does it help doing nor does it favor a HAPPY state of mind.

Practice this -

1. If something is there in your mind - a thing to do, or a task or a worry, see if you can write in on a piece of paper or note pad or on your PC.
2. Is it something you can do now - DO IT. Is it something you can give a timeline - attach a date and time slot to do it, or allot a time to complete it.
3. If it is a project kind of work, make a project map on a sheet of paper, mapping our all the major and minor tasks with timeline.
4. FINALLY, if the thing in your mind does not fall into the above scheme of thing - in your being able to transfer it to penning down on a piece of paper, then TAKE IT AWAY FROM YOUR MIND.

This is easy to practice and once done for a while, becomes a habit.

This single habit will make your worry-free (in-fact even the worries are imaginary, as you are just dumping your minds with the intention of filling it and not really wanting to act?).

As far as imagining events or people is concerned, the outcome is mostly what you vividly image in your mind. So, rather than imagine a bad day, replace it with thoughts of how a great day of your life looks, and how every single event of the day unfolds as precisely as you like it to.

Imaging is simple, and yet, when repeated in the mind, transforms into reality - when you intend a negative thing or event again and again, it essentially means that you are giving out a open invitation to 'negativity'.

Instead, make an open invitation in the mind to "positivity" - and you will see positive and successful things occurring in your life journey.

How do you kill the negative stream in your MIND? Just REPLACE it with POSITIVE EVENTS, THOUGHTS AND PEOPLE. This will also make you consciously watch the occurrences in your mind-space. Comes easily with practice.

Have a great, happy and positivity-packed day..... not just today - but every day in your LIFE.

What’s your ME brand-speak?

This is a quick follow for the earlier post!

Think about this… how much have you wanted to achieve, or have achieved, and how much of the same language does the brand you speak? If the answer if not as much as what is reality, then, there is lot of work to do on your ME brand-speak!

What’s the ME brand?

Each of our ME brands are work in progress, and a sort of focused and continuous & RIGHT self-speak efforts are needed to communicate our thoughts through our brand ME. What we are seen as is what we communicate through our ME brand-speak.

Brand ME also makes sure that you communicate your position sans any ambiguity in the professional marketplace, and equally so, on the personal front – as a spouse, as a parent and as a socially responsible person.

To throw a little illustration, if you want you/your ME brand to be seen in as a successful professional in your space, then your walk and talk ought to be in sync with all that is needed to be so – both the hardware: the efforts needed, the knowledge & skills you ought to possess, and most of all the power to execute – you will carry all this and more to be seen and also be recognized as a successful or to-be-successful professional.

And the ME brand-speak shall be seen as the ‘software’ – that makes your hardware to be seen by all those in the relevant marketplace – be it the place of work, or home, or the social ecosystem.

Your ME brand speak will talk the entire walk you can do, amply well, and sort of loud and clear in the marketplace. Loud and clear does never mean being brash about what you are made off, but is being unambiguously clear about what would make you stand out and be different out there – be it in the kind of work you do, or the sales you can achieve, or the knowledge/core competence you will bring to the table in any place.

The ME brand speak would apply equally to any work and personal situation – you need to talk the walk you do and want to do as a parent, a child, a associate in any event and so on – this can be in any place, in any time and in any situation.

The ME brand speak is also so important and crucial in bridging the gap between perception and reality, more from the extent of the value you add in any given place. I am sure most of us agree that we did not get that deal, or get that hike or promotion or anything measurable and tangible just because it was not communicated or packaged in sync with what was delivered or done in reality.

The more you think of what you keep telling everyone or what all those around you see, is more of what your ME brand-speak is. Whether this is in sync with what you as an individual are or what your true capabilities are, is more a function of your ME brand speak, that any other factor.

Its’ worth so much to gather your thoughts together to create your own ‘ME brand speak now’. It’s also a wonderful exercise to introspect all your facets of life, and create an appropriate ME brand-speak, that reflects you in the right perspective to all those in the marketplace.

So, what’s your ME brand-speak? Are you packaging you as much what your true capabilities and qualities are? Do it now, for a better & greater LIFE…..

Mind-speak – What do you talk to yourself!?

Our mind is full of chatter… we may look to be calm and serene from the outside, but that belies the real fact – the human mind is full of chatter – it is said that over 60000 thoughts come across in our mind every single day! And what we are is the result of probably the most predominant though/thoughts we carry all day and all along!

Goals, challenges, problems and worries mostly tend to dominate these thoughts! For example someone who is extremely goal driven thinks about it most of the time. And so on. Even when we are asleep, the mind chatters!

One simple way to train the mind to focus on the better side of life… what you are capable of and what you have accomplished.. is to speak to yourself in the mind.

Make affirmations to yourself, re-run your happy or winning moments, assert in your mind your capacities and your ability, rehearse the kind of happiness and victories which you foresee, and are working towards, deliberately focus your mind on the better things you have, and the great person you can be…..

In a nutshell, make sure that you sustain your mind-speak in the most productive and positive way, always, than the opposite. You can adopt your own style, and the script for the mind-speak MUST only be yours. What it also means is that you set the standards for your LIFE – never make comparisons in the mind.

If you wish, you can make a written script for your mind-speak, detailing it as per what the things you wish to be and accomplish. (Also take the help of a handful of great books which are available in this space).

Once you practice this mind-speak regularly, you will also see that your mind is better controlled in the way it straddles. And you will also make sure that you decide the dictate the predominant thought in the 60000 odds thoughts that come across in you.

Initially it may seem difficult, but with a bit of practice, and consistency, there will be profound changes in the way you think, and also in the way you act and carry yourself!

It does shape your personality in a decisive way!

What is your mind-speak now, and today?

Is “happiness” in your things to do!?

You know, i am sure you will agree with me on this – how many of us keep having a long list of things to do – could be at home, work or wherever! Most of us rattle our brains and time with such lists either in the mind, on pieces of paper in the pocket, or an organizer!

I also bet you on this too – not one item in that ‘to-d0′ list will read – BE HAPPY!

You will be amused at this, but let me brief… What is one thing which all of us want to do, but think we can’t or is elusive, despite we pushing us or chasing the to-do lists… ? It is and must be to “BE HAPPY”.

Is that not what we all want to be…

So, next time when you make your list for the day, please make this as item number 1 – BE HAPPY.

Believe me this is not silly. The moment you do that – that too put it in writing – it will be the prime state of mind and body you will be in for that day; and when you do it everyday, you are just going to BE HAPPY!

Happiness is a state of mind, and needs no reason or great accomplishment! I repeat, happiness is a state of mind!

And when your to-do list has “BE HAPPY” right there at the top, you will see that most of the other items get magically ticked off faster that they will be.

Why? Because, when you are intentionally happy, the mind is like a placid lake, free of stress and disturbance of any sort… and that makes you go ahead faster with your things to do!

So, here is note to you – in your things to-do, make “BE HAPPY” as item number.1 and start your day by ticking it

Good luck!

Whats your daily recipe... ?

Happiness stalks you, the moment you chose to date it! So, how does your daily dose of mind-food look like?

Here is a daily recipe from your Happiness guy... bring all these on in your day, and see LIFE transform!

• Wake up early. Spend the first hours being physically active – walk, stretch, cycle, just ensure that there is some good physical activity... ….fitness is a great gift you can give yourself… and your mind feels so fresh for the rest of the day
• STOP switching on the TV in the early hours of your day. It’s an idiot box as we all know, and yet how many of us just switch it on so naturally.
• Make conscious efforts to be extremely active, physically and mentally, in the early hours of the day.
• Be thankful to all you have in life NOW. It is the greatest positive vibration you can send in your mind and body
• Begin by visualizing how your perfect day will look like. Etch these visuals/images in your mind, and it mostly will come true.
• Decide and commit to stay an OPTIMIST all through the day.
• Have a want to stay happy 24/7. This might sound artificial and even ridiculous in today’s world – but having this want make you stay happy most of the time. When you are beaten down by something or someone, try saying to yourself, ‘I want to stay happy’ – repeat it about 10 times, and see how it changes you.
• Visualize in great detail – with all the colors, motion and the buzz all around… See receiving accolades, appreciation, people coming to you for advice, knowledge….
• Spend just about 5 to 10 minutes making a to-do task list - in your style. Writing/listing makes us to get to our priorities.
• Make helping others and gratitude a part of your day. Help even if in a small way. Be grateful even for the small things someone does to you.
• When you begin the day, make a simple resolution that you will focus of what you WANT. This is magical. And is the best way to ensure that we have no energy leaks.
• Consciously avoid energy leaks. Energy leaks happen when you allow your WANTS, priorities, and agenda to be taken over by others/external factors.
• Stay in the NOW in what you do/where you are. This is the best way to make sure that you deliberately enjoy every step in the day. Also staying this way when we speak to others, are in meetings, with friends etc will make us to be seen as someone who cares & contributes. It shows when we are not present in the NOW.
• Wear that smile on your face. Smile those whom you see in the lift, at the traffic signal, and get that positive attitude in you every other day. Do this consciously, and over time it will come to your naturally.
• All day, do unto others, what you expect them to do. This, even if you are a boss, or a co-worker. Treat everyone with love, dignity and respect them for what they are.
• At work, make sure you are giving in your best... don’t work for the sake of your boss, or under any kind of pressure. You decide what you must do to fulfill your role for the day – and better your own standards. Excellence comes so easily.
• If your are working on a computer all through the day, set an alarm so that you take a break every 20 or 30 minutes. Stretch, relax, share some positive words with colleagues, and check if all is well with them
• Resist the temptation to hit the send/receive button every other minute. It’s so common, even when we know that most mails in the inbox are junk. And if there is something so urgent, then the sender will call you sure.
• Through the day, you will sure encounter negativity, and some disappointment, or bad behavior by someone… when this happens, and your mood swirls towards bad, consciously push it to happiness. Think of something funny, or how you did something so well on some other occasion, how your team won that deal.
• By practice, pushing us to a happy state/better mood comes easily. It is such a great saver of time and our own energy.
• On any day, see if you’re playing the best of your strengths. How well are you using your greatest strengths is the best determinant of a great day. Done on a regular basis, this increases your self-esteem and gives your supreme self confidence.
• Stay positive. Hang out only with positive personalities. Avoid nay Sayers. And those who spend the large part of the day only in bitching, back biting, comparing etc. This is the easy and best antibiotic to make sure that your personal/professional health is always in great shape.
• Practice looking at the GOOD side in any situation. Even in a bad or dismal situation. This helps for LIFE. Learn or Let go – make this your life mantra.
• Cultivate a sense of humor. It comes by practice, and looking at the lighter side of things. Having a sense of humor eases any grim or bad situation, and also serves to alleviate stress of YOU, and those around you.
• When someone comes to have a word with you, stop what you are doing and speak/listen to them in the NOW. Listen. Listen with effort - until it comes effortlessly. Never allow them to speak as you keep scribbling something or checking mails.
• In your team, make sure that you interact with everyone as much as possible. Never get into the habit of sending a mail to the colleague in the next cubicle. Even if you have to do it by protocol, speak, share and then mail.
• To a colleague or subordinate at work, show how things can be done better, rather than just speaking and reprimanding when things go wrong. Making people do things right is your primary responsibility – not just fault finding.
• Professionally and personally, see how you add value in any situation. At home. At work. Even in the society. This is the best way to develop you as a person.
• Say Thank you as many times as you can. Cutting across all levels at office, and to anyone whom you come across in the road. And most of all to your family.
• Keep family first. Always. This is not to say that you ignore your work or profession. Working hard does not mean ignoring the near and dear. Remember, they are the bedrock of your LIFE.
• When all goes at work or even work goes off, in this ever changing world, FAMILY remains.
• At home, spend time speaking to spouse, parents and kids. Make family time protected from any digression. The couple of hours you spend this way, speaking, sharing, enjoying and loving will nourish your mind.
• Help at home whenever possible. Running a home is as tougher as today’s challenging work place. At your workplace, your failure will be made up by some else’s success – this can never happen at home. YOU MUST WIN AT HOME TO WIN AT WORK.
• Listen to some great music or inspiring talks. Read a little of the book you always wanted to read. Do this everyday.
• Use waiting time and commuting time to listen to some great stuff or read.
• Ask your spouse how her day at work or home was. Share the same about your day.
• Ask your kids what they school day was like – whom they met new, what they learnt, what was interesting etc. Kids will turn out to be great teachers, and love when the parent asks!
• Never go to sleep after watching TV for hours together. This causes mental fatigue, and upsets the next day morning. Instead, chat with spouse, kids or parents, or listen to some soothing music. It works wonders and you sleep well.
• Sleep well for seven to eight hours. Begin sleeping by visualizing pleasant things. This comes by practice and is so powerful.

So, have a great day! Every day for the rest your LIFE!

What do YOU speak to YOU!

As often as you can, say these aloud to yourself.

I am strong
I am confident
I am calm within
I can be whatever I wish to be
I am loving and caring
I always stay positive
I am thankful for what I am and what I have
My mind is the most powerful place in the planet
I am here for a purpose
I accomplish
I learn, re-learn
I express love to everyone
I always have a great day
Only the best is in store ahead of me
What is in me is bigger, omnipotent than what is out
I laugh a lot
I enjoy every step of my life
I am unique and there's no one else like me
I am endowed with the most unique skills
I carry a great attitude always
I take adversity in my stride, learn from it
I am at my best alway
I radiate positivity
I am the epicentre of all good
I live and play by my strengths
I always stay alive and active
I am thankful to my parents, spouse and kids, siblings,my extended family for what they are to me.
I acknowledge the good deeds of everyone
I forgive and let go
I am what I am
I always smile
I play a fair game
I love my work
Every occurence is for good
I give for good causes
I always add value at work, home and to the society

Make this a routine, more-so when you think that things are not really going your way.

You will see magic unfold and the perceived difficult moment/time vanish into thin air!

Happiness.. like the loving kids! Shun the 'adult' mask!!

Ever thought it to be silly to behave like the loving kids? Actually, putting up the adult mask is silly! So, now, be like kids and wow! Thought how..... Here you have it!

1. Kids smile. At anyone and everyone. They can smile for no reason. Unlike you and me - we need a volley of reasons just for a simple smile. Change that. Smile more.

2. Kids forget and forgive. They yell a second and just forget and forgive the next second. We don't. We have a mask that says you have to put on, or carry it to even the grave. Sounds stupid, but that is precisely what all of us do. Now on, learn the art of forgiving and forgetting! Master it till it comes as second nature.

3. Kids love fairplay. Kids play any game for the sake of playing. Not just to win. Kids know so well than most of us - grown adults - that there is only one winner. And they know it only matters how well you play to the finish. The winner is incidental. So, let us admit and come to terms with the fact that you just have to play well. Play well to the finish. Period.

4. Kids live in the NOW. I have never seen a kid who was preoccupied with what happened or was worried. And will bet my last rupee that you have'nt either. What about all of us? Oh...... It's so tough for us to just be present in the NOW.... And all this new age meditation gurus work so hard to just make us be in the NOW! Folks, its so easy to be in the now. In fact, its the easiest disposition to be in. From this minute, master the art of being in the NOW..... Look at kids, master it by just focussing on what you do this minute. Greatest service you do to youself is to be here and NOW....!

5. Kids master time, and just won't waste a minute. Not sure how many of us see the various manifestation of this - yet, this is a great lesson of kids. Adults get flustererd when kids always want to do something. Always - 24/7 minus sleeping hours. Its another way of saying that they would not waste a minute of the awaken hour. Let us not waste a minute of time which we have; follow the kids path. Stay alive and active, now, and always.

So much to learn from lovely little ones. It's high time we left teaching to them, and we grown ups start learning!

Love those kids. Learn from them. And shed the "adult" mask! NOW!!

Perseverance can make all the difference!

Happiness is all about making a conscious choice! A choice to remain happy, this minute, this moment. A choice, irrespective of the external conditions of life.

And its also nice to have built in our DNA the ability to stay happy. And more importantly, the ability to stay put on a whole lot of things we chose to do, and what we feel is the right thing!

The ability to succeed in any endeavor is directly proportional to the kind of investments made in persevering!

Begin today with this great thought on perseverance!

When all the world is looming dark

And things seem not so clear,

When shadows seem to hover 'round

Lord, may I persevere.

When it seems everything's been tried
And there's no way to go,
Just let me keep remembering
Sometimes the journey's slow.

I may just need to stop and rest
Along the path I trod,
A time to try to understand
And have my talk with God.

As I gain new strength to carry on
Without a doubt or fear,
Somehow I know things will be right,
And so, I persevere.

By Anne Stortz
from Chicken Soup for the Unsinkable Soul

So, stay happy, persevere, and live life today, and every other day!

Do you need help in Life...?!

As a nation, or as a culture, we all think it is taboo to seek help to get ahead in this wonderful journey called LIFE.

It's also a mindset that a happy life is one without any challenges and problems! And day in and day out, almost all of us are looking for that elusive stage, where life is devoid of any problems, challenges, and adversities...

Accept this truth in this wonderful journey of Life... The river which finds is birth in some mountain top flows, meandering through every form of land - a peak and a valley, a hill or a fall etc - and changes courses naturally with one goal - to gather more strength and power as it finds it way - rather makes it way to the mighty ocean.... all along its path, it keeps adding immense utility value for the folks who come to its touch-points!

How stale and uninteresting would it be if the river was born atop a mountain, and from there, it came in as one 'straight line' to the coast, to quietly get itself into the ocean? Leave alone how it would be, the fact remains that such is river will never ever come into existence!

Reason - its out of nature's ways for such a straight, and what you would think as problem-less river to ever come into existence. Its elusive. Its unreal. It can be only in fiction!

So is your and my Life. A Life, sans any adversity and challenge, climb and pitfall, joy and sorrow, all in a judicious mix is just not Life. Its against the universal laws of nature to be so.

Thats why this is such a wonderful journey, and all we need to do is to live it to the fullest, taking all challenges head-on, getting into our personal quality armor tonnes of life lessons, and getting better by the day, by the hour.

That way, it is certain that our lives will be full of "LIFE".

If you think that you need help in any stage of this wonderful journey, and feel that a little counsel, personality training, coaching and habit-tweaking will be of help, please feel free to connect with me.

Life Coach, The PR Workshop

Muralidharan

9840935357